It’s been a long time since a person could visit the Aging Matador, and as long since I’ve seen Angus Niemczyk. So I wandered down.

The sign on the door said to “social distance” on the back patio. I put on my mask and walked in. I wandered through the barroom with all the tables pushed against one wall, and all the chairs piled carefully on the tables. I made it to the back patio and saw that Angus was engaged across the six foot distance in a conversation. I didn’t recognize the person, but sat close enough to both of them in the case that I might join in.

The table had a laminated sign taped to the top. The sign said to text my order to the number below. A reply will come when my order is ready, and that I can pick it up at the patio bar back. So, I ordered a Bender (the biggest, strongest, cheapest drink). Within a couple minutes, my phone buzzed and notified me that my drink was ready. So I grabbed it and returned to my seat.

I turned toward Angus and his conversation partner, Chad. Chad is from the neighborhood, and is confused by some of the social dynamics at work today.

He wondered about the Black Lives Matter activity lately, and why there couldn’t be a solution. Why can’t Black people get equal treatment in the United States? Equality! Fourteenth Amendment! Can’t we just acknowledge the past and get back to treating people equally and be done with it?

Angus said “It is complicated, friend.”

And then he related a summary of both sides. That the end of slavery did not immediately result in equal treatment. In fact, the problems just began. All the vilification and fear and scapegoating. And for some reason, the disproportionate violence visited upon Black and Brown people based on a deep seated and engaged racism in this country.

That many of the memorials to Confederate war heroes were erected in the late 1800s. That those statues were set up as a giant middle finger to the North, to former slaves, etc. because losing a whole war over slavery drove old racists to declare that the situation and pride in human ownership was never going to go away. No matter where you were born, if you are brown or black you will forever be seen as “not from around here”. Forever. That black and brown people have gotten wise to the fact that even a minor infraction can lead to death during an arrest.

Angus then asked Chad to put himself in the mindset of a young black or brown person. That ANY interaction with the police can quickly turn into an arrest, an overzealous detention, or even death. That pretty much every black or brown person has some sort of negative interaction with the police from the very first moment of their awareness.

That a black or brown person begins to feel like their life isn’t worth much, that he is seen as a suspect or a perp. Maybe he is told that he “fits a description” or “matches a profile” or just doesn’t give enough fealty to the random police officer who wants to feel important. Basically, in EVERY interaction with a police officer or authority figure that a black or brown person is already starting with two strikes against them, no matter what.

Now, imagine you are driving alone at night in a neighborhood, where you don’t fit the profile of the neighborhood, or your car is “too nice” for the police person’s estimation of who you are, or what your profession is. And now you get pulled over, and you demand to know why. And the police officer gets upset by your “uppity” response, and now the dynamic is that you are hostile and uncooperative, and maybe even suspicious, or that you meet a profile, or a call over the radio for a stolen car is similar enough to the one you are driving. So, the officer calls for backup.

And if the interaction continues to escalate, you might get forcibly removed from the car, and roughed up a little while getting detained. And after an hour or two, and multiple consultations between officers over the radio, your car might get searched by K9 officers, and torn apart looking for evidence to use against you. Your car will get towed to an impound lot, and you will be taken to the police precinct to make sure everything is completely in line. Since you haven’t done anything wrong, they decide to let you go free. But now you have to get your car out of impound, and there is a fee for that. And the office might not allow reclamation of vehicle until early the next morning.

Chad, are you feeling like you’ve been wronged? Chad said “Hell Yes!” Feel like there’s anything you can do about it? “Yes! I’m going to raise Hell until someone apologizes.”

Angus shook his head slowly. Then he explained that the police have followed their procedures. That you fit a profile, that they didn’t officially charge you with anything, that they were operating out of a spirit of trying to protect and serve the neighborhood. There is officially not anything that the police did incorrectly, so there is nothing to apologize for. Your time and inconvenience and expense for reclaiming your car is just part of the protection and service. Raise too much of a ruckus and you might find that your car gets pulled over with increasing frequency. Add to this, the frustrating lack of reciprocal white folks getting pulled over in neighborhoods where they “don’t fit in.”

It reminded me of a conversation I had in 1990 with an Arab Christian while I was an exchange student. He was a proud Palestinian, though not supportive of the PLO, because the PLO was still in active life as an anti-Israel force. So, I - a naive white American from the midwest - asked him what does the PLO want? What will they accept that will immediately stop the violence? Without batting an eye, he told me “When Israel gives back the Golan Heights, the West Bank, and the Gaza Strip.” It seemed so simple. So, why not?

About 25 years later, I saw Bill Clinton explain in a documentary how he tried to broker the Mid-east Peace deal. That both sides were entrenched in their positions, and neither wanted to be seen as accommodating the other. That even the ownership of a single stretch of road has deep cultural and political importance to both sides. That the Israelis demanded safety and assurances that any return of land wouldn’t result in increased danger to Israel or Israelis. In short, there was to be no way to accomplish the simple return of a given ROAD, let alone the more substantial three essential properties.

So, Chad, how does one group of people just suddenly unlearn their fear, suspicion, and default belief that the Other is somehow lesser, or perhaps even non-human? Ultimately, it seems like that wholesale rejection of racism, and especially systemic racism, is the only true way to change things.

Chad was quiet for quite a while. He didn’t accept that the scenario was accurate, and was feeling like Angus and I teamed up on him. We all sipped our drinks for a while in silence. Then Chad got up, settled his tab, and left. I asked Angus did he think that Chad will see things differently now?

Angus said “Probably not. How can we expect one conversation to have a profound effect on someone? But, maybe he’ll have another similar conversation soon, or maybe he’ll check the scenario out with a black or brown person he knows, and he’ll either believe it more or less. It all depends. It’s complicated, friend.”

We raised our glasses to that.